What is the holdup? Seriously. I've been standing out here waiting to get into this warehouse or barn or whatever it is for the last hour. Bad enough we all had to ride packed in that train. At least they could get us into some shelter. It looks like it's going to rain, too. You'd think they would have planned this thing better. I don't even know what we're doing out here, but I'll tell you what: In about 20 minutes I'm going to do some serious complaining.
I don't even understand what they're doing. I mean if this is some kind of new system for milking us, it's a complete failure. What's going on? Brenda! Brenda! Bren -- you see anything through the crack in that door? The door, Brenda. You're standing in front of it! What?! Okay, thanks anyway. I said THANKS! (halfwit).
They don't even have any food or water for us out here. That really ticks me off. What do they expect us to do? We're cows, dammit. We're not going to order takeout. If they don't watch out some of the older ones are going to just start dropping, and then where will they be? That would really serve 'em right. I wonder if they've even thought about that risk they're running, having all these cows packed together here outside...
Frances, my nose is two feet from your behind, and if you break wind again so help me, I'm going to put a hoof up in there. You want to test me? Huh? Crap, I'm losing it. I hope this ends soon, because I don't know if I can handle this.
Hey, Brenda's gone. Thank. God. It looks like they're lining us up and getting us in. Finally, people! Well it's about time. I tell you what, I'm going to complain anyway. They ought to know that someone made a mistake somewhere. They can't fix it if someone doesn't say something. And I'm just the cow to do it. I can make some noise when I want to.
Oh, this place is a mess in here. What are they doing? Who the hell do they think they're dealing with?! This is just disgraceful. That guy up there with the drill-thingy looks like he's in charge -- I'll tell him. He doesn't know it yet, but his day is about to get ugly. I'm going to walk right up and give him a piece of my mind.
Wonder Whether There's a Baseball Game On Tonight - Why one should closely read the list of job qualifications and duties before applying for a job. (Karoli Kuns, Crooks and Liars; commentary on Reuters art...