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Tuesday, June 4, 2013
"I'm Tired Of Transgressive Edgeplay" By Michele Bachmann
Like a lot of you I started out pretty vanilla - one of those "safe, sane, consensual" BDSM clubs that advertise at a women's rec center and teach chubby middle-aged couples how to use a spreader bar. God I'm amazed I used to think that was daring! Anyway I wandered out of that pretty quickly: I toyed with different kinds of risk-aware stuff: a lot of humiliation and fear play. Then I did some suffocation, some punishment shaving, a little fire cupping... and a few kidnapping scenarios that got deep into some dark territory. But nothing, absolutely nothing, got my rocks off like being a socially conservative Republican. I thought the thrill would last forever. I really did.
Do you know what it's like to pass a law that straps a chastity belt around millions of people you don't even know? Or to start talking smack about how some random Muslim person might be part of a terrorist fifth column - and there's no way to prove he or she isn't of course, so they just have to live in a nightmare of paranoia you created? I choked out a whole roomful of sorority girls once and locked them in a storage unit. But what I did in Congress over these past few years was a thousand times more intense. I think rightwing politicians are exploring the last really shocking and unpredictable kind of dominance work in the whole world. Telling someone their entire life is going to be destroyed because I have these weird religious beliefs... that is one sick, hot ball of deviance right there. Putting a district court judge in pony-leather doesn't even come close.
But it's over. Whatever circuits I have are burnt out. I can't go back to hot wax and light spanking after this. It's time to close up shop and try to completely reinvent myself. I'm going to take a good long while and think about my next move. Goodbye.
And whoever moves into my old office: You might want to bleach it down. Thoroughly. Every surface. Stuff happened there.