Sunday, July 19, 2015

A Message From The 7,100 Nuclear Warheads Donald Trump Wants To Control


Hey guys. How ya doin'? Thought we'd check in and see where everyone's head's at. Many of us are locked up pretty tight in subs or silos, many in storage... We don't get out much. But some of the guys heard rumors, and we wanted to have a talk.

So... Donald Trump wants to be president? That's happening? And evidently he's getting some good poll numbers right now. Is that true? Well, okay. I guess you guys know what you're doing.

Anyway here's an article about an incident where a Norwegian rocket launch almost triggered a nuclear war with Russia in 1995. It's by a retired top-level US Navy adviser on nuclear weapons. The point of the article is that only a relatively calm relationship between the US and Russia saved you from accidentally... putting all of us into action. You don't have that kind of relationship with Russia anymore. Not at all. There are a number of potential flashpoints, and sooner or later there will be more errors like that rocket launch. That is definitely going to happen.

The situation is "dire." The writer used the word "dire." Great piece. Really interesting. Please, please read it. You should learn about this.

Anyway, Donald Trump, huh? You like him because he's not afraid to get into it with people, and that's entertaining to you. The guy's a scrapper, isn't he? Really speaks his mind. It should be interesting, seeing him and Putin together. Yep.

Russia has 7,500 warheads. Did you know that part? Yeah, I mean we're the ones that would be launched at them. But the ones they have... those are the ones that will - I mean would - be coming back here to hit you.

They have an 800 kiloton warhead on the SS-18 M6 Satan ICBM. The rocket's really called Satan, yes. Anyway it makes a fireball a mile wide and 4,000 times hotter than the surface of the sun. Then it creates what's essentially a hurricane, only with fire. Just fire and wind travelling hundreds of miles an hour. Nine miles away from it, you get 3rd and 4th degree burns. They have 700 of that kind of bomb. Just that kind.

How many big cities does the US have anyway?

Okay. We'll just get back to, you know... Waiting.

Good luck.

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5 comments:

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. Not funny. This is very serious stuff. Of course you know this. God help us all (this when when I really hope there is a God).

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    1. I know, I know. I want to go back and do another piece about this, because it's bigger than Donald Trump. We need to lower the temperature with the Russkies, reduce stockpiles, etc. I'm glad we're actually trying to engage with Iran on this as well - that's part of it, I think.

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  3. Funny as hell, and BECAUSE it's serious stuff. But Trump? Just the goofiest bozo in the GOP clown car. I mean, "bomb bomb Iran", anybody? And that was the Hard-nosed Cold Warrior, the "realist" wing of the GOP.

    Watching the GOP today is like watching that fucking "Secret Life of Pets" trailer...

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    1. I know. It's getting worse, man. Jesus. Just give me a few foreign policy realists who want to hash things out like grownups so we don't have a war every five years. Is that REALLY beyond our capabilities?

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